I don’t usually discuss my vajaja with grown ups, or any males for that matter especially not family members so this is for purely entertainment purposes.
The other day I was given a gift voucher to The four Seasons Spa in Paris. The gift voucher was for 50Euro which, for a little South African who times everything by ten is quite a lot, but in Paris and especially in this top spa my 50Euro voucher could not get me very far actually, the only thing it could get my was a bikini wax. So I resorted to an extravagant bikini wax which was much against my “spending morals” as nothing worth that much had ever been near my vajaja let alone done to it.
I decided to make an occasion of this Spa day and dressed up, went early, enjoyed the sauna and swimming pool as well as the herbal teas and English speaking people around. I was greeted in French by Lillian and led into a beautiful, peaceful room where my wax would take place. Petals covered the bed, classical music played in the background and sweet smelling essence filled the room_ all making for the right environment for a 50Euro bikini wax. I lay down, Lillian applied the wax and ripped (just cause it cost more doesn’t mean it hurt less), she looked and repeated the procedure. At the end of the session, she applied a soft (apparently secret Four Seasons cream although I thought it looked like good old Vaseline) and poured me some more relaxing tea.
I went to the change room and put on my clothes not inspecting my new 50Euro piece of art, handed in my voucher and went back into reality of hot weather, grumpy Frenchmen and my room which is smaller than one shower at Spa. That evening I got undressed and as I looked down I saw what every women dreads: a lopsided vajaja! Yes that’s it right, after excruciating pain and 50Euro I was now lopsided..
August 29, 2007 at 3:07 pm
You have me rolling on the floor. In laughter.
Bailey x
October 23, 2007 at 6:33 am
So – where do I start? Am not sure if I am allowed / meant to be reading this – but I can tell you that I shut my legs tight about 3 lines in while sitting on the shanghai metro reading your story
Btw You are in paris where the price to go near a vajaja is at least 500E – time for a prize rise kiddo!
For my own comprehension, is a lopsided vajaja the same as a crooked bajingo, an askew manoonoo or a lazy lab? I think so.. As a guy, you move into your twenties with the likelihood of having “chosen a side” – ie which side do you dress the meat and potatoes on.. Down the centre is a “cut lunch” and then you’re either a right or a left leaner.. Myself? Well I’ll leave that to conjecture.. But forever more you a lopsided.. Retrain the lower brain to hang the other side? Months of uncomfortable rehabilitation for the little fella (I am secure in my manhood) ensue – and often you feel a little off centre forever more – slowly fading back to your original preferred side..
I sympathise with you – but it will all grow back.. Or you could move here to china where vajaja art is in beginning phases – so the local preference (I am told) is still 1970s penthouse berber rug..
Enjoy the evening paris breezes..
Your website is fun!
Mx
August 15, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Listen, this is histerical !!! I work with you dad and he just told me about the blog – stunning ! Enjoy